How do I tell my spouse I want a divorce?
Are you thinking of getting divorced? But you don’t know how to tell your spouse? In our experience, a successful divorce starts with a well-prepared divorce announcement.
Divorce: how to say it step by step?
Steps for announcing a divorce if you’re not unfaithful
Divorce is often a traumatic event in your personal life, and you need to be well prepared to achieve a peaceful divorce with as little resentment as possible.
1. Ask yourself the right questions?
It’s certainly a question of introspection on your own life and love situation, but it’s also about asking yourself what the consequences of your divorce will be.
Where will you live? Do you want custody of the children? Do you want to keep the family home? What kind of relationship do you want to have with your husband after the divorce? Do you have enough income to support yourself? How much compensation can you get?
Finally, would you be happier without your spouse?
2. Ask the right question to your spouse
It’s never easy to use the word divorce in a relationship. But talking about divorce is the best way to prepare for your separation. Ask your partner openly, “Do you want a divorce?” The answer will often be “Why, do you want a divorce?” The discussion is now open, and you need to tell him/her that you want to discuss the matter.
3. The best argument: sincerity
Try to be as sincere as possible about your reasons for wanting a divorce.
4. Give him/her time to think
Once you’ve told your partner why you want a divorce, give him/her some time to think things over. However, it’s important to give him/her a date by which he/she will have to make up his/her mind. The animosity surrounding this period of uncertainty must not be allowed to drag on.
So you can tell him/her that you’ll give him/her a week or two to think it over, but that his/her decision will have to be made.
5. Materialize your separation
After discussion and reflection, it’s time to make the separation a reality. If you can, move out of the home you share (if you agree and can obtain and keep proof of this agreement). If you can’t, start by making a separate bed.
Then discuss the consequences you want to give to your divorce ( children, alimony, division of property…). You can put this in writing, which will make the separation more concrete.
6. Choose divorce by mutual consent
Ask your spouse if he or she would prefer to divorce by mutual consent. Explain to him/her that this divorce will protect his/her interests and yours.
7. Suggest a lawyer
Divorce by mutual consent takes place without a judge, so you each have your own lawyer. Both lawyers will make sure that the interests of both spouses are respected.
Steps for announcing a divorce if your spouse is unfaithful
1. Consult a lawyer
Your lawyer will ask you if you wish to initiate a divorce for fault. If so, the lawyer will provide you with various means of proving your spouse’s infidelity.
Your lawyer will initiate proceedings for divorce for fault, or for definitive alteration of the marital bond. You can inform your spouse of this with the advice of your lawyer, or wait until he or she receives the writ of divorce.
2. Gather evidence of your spouse’s adultery
If your spouse stays out all night, your lawyer will suggest that you have a bailiff draw up a statement of adultery. The bailiff will go to the place where the infidelity took place early in the morning, to take your spouse by surprise. The judge’s authorization is required. Other means of notification are also available, such as text messages, telephone conversations and testimonials from acquaintances.
Steps for announcing a divorce if you are unfaithful
By being unfaithful to your spouse, you are breaking the obligation of fidelity imposed on you by marriage. If your spouse can prove your infidelity, he or she may be able to demand a divorce for fault.
You should ask your spouse if he or she wishes to divorce you, and if not, you can initiate divorce proceedings for definitive alteration of the marital bond.
Are you thinking of getting divorced? But you don’t know where to start? You can use AGN Avocats’ online divorce by mutual consent procedure. If you agree to divorce your spouse, you’ll get a divorce for 990 euros. You’ll benefit from the advice of a local lawyer in the AGN Avocats network, who will advise you on the steps to take and the consequences of your separation.